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The Definitive 2014/15 NBA League Pass Ratings (Part VI) – With Help From Giannis Antetokounmpo!

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5 divisions down, 1 to go, as we finish up rating each team’s League Pass watchability on a scale of 1-5 Greek freaks. Having earlier admonished the Lakers for making the sensible choice and letting go of the eponymous hero of this site, as well as covering the rest of the Pacific Division, it’s now time to appraise the Texas teams, plus Memphis and N’Awlins. By process of elimination, it’s The Definitive 2014/15 NBA League Pass Ratings: Southwest Division edition.

  • Houston Rockets – Don’t get me wrong, I love Daryl Morey’s grand plan, which has so far manifested itself most blatantly down in the D-League. Solely shooting from close- and 3 point-range makes a lot of sense what with the mounting evidence that the midrange game is horribly inefficient, and at the surface level, seems like a hell of a fun way to play. To watch though, well, judging by the the 2013/14 incarnation of the Rockets… not so much. Whether it was the unimaginative coaching of Kevin McHale, the endless flopping of James Harden, or the mind-numbing Hack-a-Dwight tactic that is so often (rightfully) employed by opposing coaches, Houston were downright tedious viewing for much of last season. Sure, the Rockets have talent – Harden is a dynamite scorer perfectly suited to Morey’s offensive plan, but I’d accuse anyone who says they enjoy watching him and his turnstile defense of having a beard fetish*. Worse still, that overall talent level has been sapped by a terrible offseason – covered succinctly here by Andrew Sharp – which will likely ensure Houston doesn’t improve either statistically or aesthetically in 2014/15. 1.5

  • Memphis Grizzlies – Having justifiably earned acclaim thanks to their fine record the two previous seasons, the 2013/14 Grit ‘n’ Grind Grizzlies were never going to be confused with the gorgeous offenses of clubs such as San Antonio. Without even a smidgen of floor spacing and Zach Randolph perpetually banged-up, everything offensively revolved around the high post passing of Marc Gasol, with games being won principally thanks to strong defense. It was therefore no surprise that when Gasol went down for 23 games, Memphis submarined; while the Grizzlies were 40-19 with the big Spaniard in the lineup, they went 10-13 without him, as their offense sank to watching-paint-dry boredom levels. This year, not much has changed; much of the roster remains the same, save for the replacement of Mike Miller with Vince Carter, as Memphis again look to accrue 50+ wins by walking opponents into submission**. Consider yourself warned, and for the sake of Memphis fans, pray for Marc Gasol. 1
  • New Orleans Pelicans – This rating, and the Pelicans’ entire season really, is dependent on health and the continued maturation of Anthony Davis. Last year New Orleans was bitten hard by the injury bug, with both Jrue Holiday and Ryan Anderson missing huge chunks of time, Tyreke Evans being nagged by various maladies all year, and Eric Gordon inevitably also missing time. Even Davis, in a crime against all League Pass subscribers, was sidelined for 16 games, depriving viewers of the only real reason to tune in to the ‘cans. In just his second season, we saw a glimpse of the future when Davis put up an impressive 20.8/10/1.6/1.3/2.8 line and singlehandedly made New Orleans watchable, but was ultimately unable to lift his squad beyond 29-37 in games he started. The way he’s playing in Spain for the USAB team during the FIBA World Cup of Basketball would suggest an even more exciting leap is on the horizon too, which has to be taken into consideration when determining New Orleans’ rating. In other news, the addition of Omer Asik won’t especially move the needle aesthetically, though if it means less Alexis Ajinca it’s a plus, while hopefully the team mascot – after undergoing a makeover for the All-Star game – will be less terrifying for a full season this time out. After all, while Davis might be great, he can’t be expected to solve New Orleans’ in-house entertainment problems as well as keeping their LP rating afloat. 2
  • San Antonio Spurs – It’s perhaps fitting that these ratings conclude on one of the most aesthetically pleasing teams across the association, and the reigning NBA champions. If there was any shred of doubt in the viewing pleasure San Antonio could possibly inspire lingering from their admittedly dire mid-aughts dominance, it was torn apart in a similar fashion to Miami’s defense during the Spurs’ beautiful evisceration of the defending champs back in June. You should all know the playbook by now; Coach Popovich won’t play anyone over 30 minutes a night, give Tim Duncan, Tony Parker and Manu Ginobili plenty of nights off by using every ounce of roster depth, and the awe-inspiring offense will look exactly the same as the Spurs win 50+. Boris Diaw will look fat and winded, and then string together 4 straight possessions in which he’ll toss 2 no-look assists, drill a three, and take a smaller defender down in the post. Kawhi Leonard, the Finals MVP lest you forget, will harass an opposing wing into a tough midrange fallaway, gather the outlet and throw down a mighty dunk, then look nonplussed. Patty Mills will wave his towel. Danny Green will be anonymous for 44 minutes, then bury a flurry of threes to put the final nail in the coffin. And at no point will you ever be bored, even though you know exactly what’s coming. Just sit back, and enjoy the League Pass show. 5GA

* Watching Patrick Beverley harass opposing point guards for 94 feet on the other hand, is entirely defensible.

** Their number of possessions per game, at 89.9, made their closest contenders, 29th-ranked Chicago, look like Philadelphia in terms of pace.

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The Definitive 2014/15 NBA League Pass Ratings (Part V) – With Help From Giannis Antetokounmpo!

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With the Northwest Division covered yesterday, we’ve cracked open the Western Conference and reached the two-thirds mark in the process of rating teams by their League Pass potential on a scale of 1-5 Greek Freaks. Onwards then, to the home of my beloved Suns; it’s The Definitive 2014/15 NBA League Pass Ratings: Pacific Division edition.

  • Golden State Warriors – A proven-solid League Pass commodity, there’s really little excuse to drastically alter your perception of Golden State from last season to this after they opted for stasis this past offseason. Rather than parting company with Klay Thompson and his nightly 18-2-2 line (and simultaneously shedding David Lee‘s contract), the Dubs ultimately decided against teaming Steph Curry with Kevin Love – and y’know, having two of the top ten players in the league, because how awful would it be to break up the Splash Brothers. Instead, the only real change will come on the bench; after the mysterious case of Joe Lacob vs. Mark Jackson ended in a Lacob win by majority decision, Steve Kerr will now be tasked with advancing Golden State beyond the Conference Semi-Finals. Finishing higher than a sixth seed – as they have for the past two years – would be a good place to start, so the raucous Oracle crowd has more opportunity to influence results come Playoff time. Until then, there will be a ton of threes, an Andrew Bogut injury or three, and thousands of questions as to why they didn’t do anything to get better over the offseason; business as usual for the League Pass-friendly Warriors then. 4
  • Los Angeles Clippers – Three years in to the Chris Paul era, and the Clippers are still yet to advance to the Western Conference Finals. To be fair, they did have Vinny Del Negro (not) coaching them for the first two campaigns, and the ignominious – to say the least – Donald Sterling saga swirling over them last year, but still, this is a team with the talent to win it all, and they’ve underwhelmed in that regard so far. Where Los Angeles hasn’t disappointed however, is on League Pass; ‘Lob City’ is one of the most generous benefactors of nightly entertainment ever to bless my laptop screen. Jaw-dropping feats of athleticism are the norm thanks to DeAndre Jordan and Blake Griffin, the latter also becoming one of the most destructive low-post forces in the game with his combination of moves and passing last season. Jamal Crawford, JJ Redick and the newly-added Spencer Hawes should make it rain from deep. Both their away and alternate jerseys are tremendously underrated, while the Clips’ broadcast team – led by Ralph Lawler – is also above-average. And then there’s CP3, Point God. The only downside to the Clippers in fact, aside from Doc Rivers‘ penchant for signing washed-up guys who beat him in the Eastern Conference five years ago (Hedo Turkoglu‘s name immediately springs to mind), is the unavoidable late starts to their games. West Coast games often mean late nights for those in the East, let alone for the Transatlantic fan! For that very nit-picky reason, Los Angeles are for now excluded from the League Pass echelon of OKC and Cleveland. A hot start involving more YouTube clips like this though, and they could quickly join those select two at the LP plateau, time difference be damned. 4.5

  • Los Angeles Lakers – To put it kindly, the eponymous hero of this blog (and his moustache) didn’t set the basketball world alight with his tactics last year. With the likes of Nick Young, Xavier Henry and Wes Johnson unfortunately forced into roles of high emphasis due to poor roster construction (S/O to Kobe’s horrific contract by the way – #KGDC), and aging veterans such as Steve Nash and Pau Gasol clearly running on fumes, Coach D’Antoni decided to… play at the second fastest pace in the league?! With an average of 98.7 possessions per game, even on their best nights the purple and gold gave opposing teams a large enough sample size to force their way back into games by eventually exploiting the often vast talent difference. At their worst, well, there’s a reason why Los Angeles finished with the 28th ranked defense in terms of points allowed per 100 possessions (110.6 if you were interested) – it’s hard to think of a single 2013/14 Laker that could be considered above average defensively. Still, in the same way that a train wreck is compelling, D’Antoni’s motley crew were at least mildly interesting. The same can’t really be said of their League Pass worthiness this year; Kobe’s back (supposedly), as is Steve Nash (again, supposedly), and joined by the likes of Jeremy Lin, Carlos Boozer and the giant fork sticking out of Boozer’s back, will ensure the Lakers are horrific defensively again. Sure, Los Angeles’ scandalous play last year bagged Julius Randle, but the re-tread hire of Byron Scott – after 3 interviews mind you – doesn’t exactly inspire my confidence in their competency. The Lakers are going to be bad, again. And they’re going to be bereft of glorious facial hair patrolling the sidelines too, demanding they run under every circumstance, because to hell the boring, sensible thing to do. Urgh. At least they retained Swaggy P. 0.5
  • Phoenix Suns – After being the consensus feel-good story of the 2013/14 season under first-year coach Jeff Hornacek, the sheen Eric Bledsoe, Nice to Know You.” href=”https://mikedmoustache.wordpress.com/2014/08/28/eric-bledsoe-nice-to-know-you/” target=”_blank”>is definitely off the Suns at the minute. That’s not to say they won’t be incredibly entertaining again, because they will be; the rabid backcourt pairing of Eric Bledsoe and Goran Dragic (not to mention new addition Isaiah Thomas), as well as the high flying tendencies of Gerald Green, and the fraternal celebrations of the Morris twins should ensure Phoenix are a more than solid League Pass fixture. But the Suns won’t be sneaking up on anyone this year – part of the intense fun of 2013/14. Teams know what they’re getting, and what they’re getting is still flawed. As surprisingly good as Miles Plumlee turned out to be, he’s not scaring anyone up front. And barring TJ Warren morphing into Carmelo Anthony overnight, none of the Suns’ collection of swingmen and stretch fours are making opponents sweat either. If a team comes prepared to run, and stop back court penetration, they’re in with a good shot. Still, for the objective League Pass observer, you’re not flipping over if the Suns are playing your team of choice. For the irrational, pessimistic Phoenix fan like me, the ride might unfortunately regress in enjoyability the second time around.3.5
  • Sacramento Kings – BOOGIE! Looking from afar, in Cousins, Gay, Nik Stauskas and Ben McLemore, the Kings have some solid pieces in place to put together a nicely entertaining 2014/15 campaign. Putting them under the microscope however, reveals some inconvenient truths; is Darren Collison really a starting point guard? How many balls are there to go round, with such a black-hole offense? Why are Jason Thompson and Derrick Williams, who are pictured next to the word ‘Tweener’ in my basketball glossary, both earning more than $6 million this year? Are there a more unlikely set of teammates in the entire league than 7-5 Sim Bhullar and Reggie Evans?! For all the superficial niceties and occasional highlights, this probably isn’t going to end well record-wise. Nor will their outstanding home crowd win them any LP brownie points, as their stellar contribution is offset by the lamentable contributions of the broadcast team*. Sacramento might at least be absorbing to monitor off the court this year – and not in the way that the Maloof’s incredible loathsomeness was. Under the stewardship of still relatively new owner Vivek Ranadive, the Kings are hilariously all in; don’t be surprised to see them swing a misguided trade for Josh Smith or Rajon Rondo (despite him saying he won’t sign an extension there) in an effort to win now. Oh Vivek, your puppy-like enthusiasm is adorably mistaken – here, have a generous rating for trying. 2.5

* If I hear ‘If you don’t like that, you don’t like NBA basketball!’ exclaimed even once this year, I may need frog-marching away from my laptop before buying a flight to Sacramento and doing something I may later regret.

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The Definitive 2014/15 NBA League Pass Ratings (Part IV) – With Help From Giannis Antetokounmpo!

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Having ripped through the Eastern Conference in my League Pass Ratings series earlier this week – most recently covering the Southeast division – today, I move out West. Using the innovative Giannis score system, it’s time to cover perhaps the most entertaining set of five teams in basketball, at least at this preseason juncture anyway. It’s The Definitive 2014/15 NBA League Pass Ratings: Northwest Division edition.

  • Denver Nuggets – Lacking star power and beset by injuries, the Nuggets anonymously stumbled through a 36-46 in their first season with Brian Shaw at the helm. Of course, with much the same roster and George Karl coaching the year previous, they romped their way to a 3 seed and a franchise-record 57 wins, but hey, who am I to judge… Ahem. Anyway, even with spicy meatball Danilo Gallinari, Lil’ Nate Robinson and Shaqtin’ a Fool standout JaVale McGee coming back from injury, as well as the curiously similar additions of Aaron Afflalo and Gary Harris at the shooting guard spot, there appears to be little hope of Denver returning to the heights of 2012/13 anytime soon – especially in the loaded West. Their frenetic pace remains a silver living at least; despite Shaw’s desire to play ‘inside-out’ and feature more low-post play from Kenneth Faried (who is proving that 5th gear is his only speed right now on the USAB team), Denver still registered the third highest number of possessions per game in 2013/14, with 98.1. With McGee back too, hopefully there should be some increased unintentional comedy. Otherwise, the Nuggets look to be eerily uninteresting once more.2
  • Minnesota Timberwolves – I present to you first Your Honour, Andrew Wiggins’ high school mixtape. My second piece of evidence – clips of Zach Levine dunking. And finally, some Ricky Rubio passes. Now please, given how Minnesota have arguably the deepest trove of young assets across the league, and ooze athleticism, tell me how this isn’t going to be a fun ride? Given their boundless potential – shout out to Gorgui Dieng killing it for Senegal in the FIBA World Cup of Basketball by the way – the Timberwolves are certainly going to be compelling League Pass watch at times this season, but for all that promise, there are gonna to be a ton of losses still. With Rubio and his historically awful outside touch, as well as the loss of Kevin Love, their floor spacing might be even worse this year than last, while no one has been brought in to mask Nikola Pekovic‘s glaringly ground-bound deficiencies on the defensive end. Pinning all hope on the youngsters might be rather presumptuous too; new coach/GM Flip Saunders has always favoured playing veterans over unproven commodities in the past, meaning the Anthony Bennett reclamation project may yet be scrapped in favour of extended minutes for Corey Brewer and Thaddeus Young. Still everyone knows this riposte, and season ticket sales have still dramatically increased ever since the Love trade. The Target Center fans know already – this is going to be a bad team worth watching. 3.5

  • Oklahoma City Thunder – Sure, Kevin Durant didn’t exactly cover himself in offseason glory what with the ill-timed withdrawal from the USAB fold while his shoe contract negotiations dragged out very publicly, but his excuse of suffering from both physical and mental fatigue was completely warranted; with Russell Westbrook on the shelf too often for my viewing pleasure last year, KD shouldered an unholy load for vast swathes of the season, and only got better. In case you had forgotten, whilst leading the league in minutes played for the third time in five years, Durant also captured his fourth scoring title over the same stretch, becoming the first player since Michael Jordan in 1988/89 to average 32+ PPG, 7+ RPG and 5+ APG for the season. He ran a streak of scoring 25+ to 41 games before only notching 23 in a blowout win over Sacramento (Durant sat the entire 4th quarter). His January splits were frankly, obscene; In 15 games from Jan 4-31, the Slim Reaper averaged 36.7 points, 6.2 rebounds, and 6.2 assists per game while shooting 54.7 percent from the floor and 43.6 percent from beyond the arc. It was during that stretch that poor Golden State and Portland found out the hard way the awesome extent of the MVP’s powers, and it was incredible – even LeBron acknowledged so. And that my friends, without even mentioning Point Godzilla Russell Westbrook, Serge I-Blocka, Scott Brooks‘ wobbly chair status, and the calamitously cheap offseason the front office had, is why you should watch OKC darn near every night this season – Kevin Bleepin’ Durant.5GA
  • Portland Trail Blazers – Having visited the Rose Garden – fine, The Moda Center – last April (and taking in a truly awesome OT game versus the Golden State Warriors), I can safely attest that Portland has the best home crowd in the league. On the cusp of making the playoffs and up against a similarly good Western Conference rival, the atmosphere was absolutely electric. So yes, given that I own a Wes Matthews shirsey (obligatory #Worst), this rating might be a tad biased. But even stepping back into the shoes of an objective League Pass consumer, the Trail Blazers figure to be an enjoyable watch once again this season. Coach Terry Stotts’ flow offense, with a bevy of capable three-point shooters surrounding LaMarcus Aldridge and his mid-range prowess, is exceedingly smooth on the eye, not to mention efficient – the Blazers trailed only the Clippers in points per 100 possessions, scoring 111.5. Plus, at the end of games, Damian Lillard – who in his third year in the league should be playing with a point to prove after being the last cut from the USAB roster this sumer – is a cold-blooded killer. I could list positives for paragraphs, but in the interests of succinctness, here are some pithy highlights to look out for in 2014/15; Stotts’ fashion sense, Robin Lopez‘s hair, the impending CJ McCollum fantasy breakout, and those gorgeous alternate jerseys. Oh Portland, you are the beautiful League Pass mistress to my marriage with the Suns. 4.5
  • Utah Jazz – I was a lot more bullish on the Jazz before the FIBA World Cup of Basketball got underway, and Dante Exum was the still the finest Australian product since Vegemite. Now, with him struggling to crack the Aussie rotation, I’m beginning to worry for Utah fans who were pinning their hopes on the unproven point guard. Because really, what else do they have to be excited about? New coach Quin Snyder replacing the God-awful Ty Corbin?! The Jazz had an extremely quiet offseason, their only especially notable move being one cleverly induced by the Hornets; Charlotte gleefully exploited Utah’s gobs of cap space by handing RFA Gordon Hayward a four-year, $63 million offer sheet which the Jazz had little option but to match considering the struggles of the Derrick Favors and Trey Burke, Utah’s other young assets, in 2013/14. Whether the still-young Hayward can stand up to leading this moribund team after undeniably wilting as the first banana last year projects to be the only narrative (aside from Exum’s development, or lack of it) worth pursuing at any point this season – with apologies to Zach Lowe, the minutiae of Rudy Gobert‘s game is not worth your League Pass time, just like Utah in general. 1
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The Definitive 2014/15 NBA League Pass Ratings (Part III) – With Help From Giannis Antetokounmpo!

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You know the drill by now; with the product officially available, I’m rating each team in the NBA on their League Pass watchability for the upcoming season. Back in the Atlantic Division Edition, I laid out how I (extremely subjectively) determine the ratings, and explained the Giannis score system. Yesterday I covered the Central Division – featuring the preseason League Pass Team of the Year. Today, as I round out the Eastern Conference, we visit the Southeast, home to some of the most apathetic fan bases across the league. This year however, at least a couple of home crowds should be genuinely excited to watch their teams put in work, at least according to these scores – it’s The Definitive 2014/15 NBA League Pass Ratings: Southeast Division edition.

  • Atlanta Hawks – In somewhat of an annual tradition at this point, the Hawks quietly flew under the radar with yet another solid, but unspectacular campaign in 2013/14. Despite losing star power forward Al Horford to a torn pectoral muscle midway through the season for a second consecutive year, Atlanta impressively mustered up enough around Paul Millsap to sneak into the Eastern playoffs as a no. 8 seed, before scaring the crap out of the Pacers in an eventual 4-3 first round loss. That enthralling series was a skewed representation of Atlanta’s style however; throughout the rest of the season, they played at an average pace (94.6 possessions per game, 13th in the league), with a blah offense (105.9 points per 100 possessions, 18th best, though with the 2nd highest 3 point attempt rate), and a mediocre defense (106.4 points allowed per 100 possessions, 17th), good for a distinctly forgettable season. Under second-year coach Mike Budenholzer, expect similarly middling results going forward. Though Horford should be back healthy, their only significant offseason addition was draftee Adreian Payne, whose range as a shooter will likely push out one of the few interesting rotation pieces from last year – Macedonia’s greatest basketball export, Pero Antic. The “screech” sound effect and Harry the Hawk give Atlanta a few favorable points, but as the fans that sparsely attend the Philips Arena know already, there’s a reason the Hawks reside on NBA TV every Spring. 1.5
  • Charlotte Hornets – If they had fully re-embraced the Hornets identity, and gone back to these natty threads, I’d have a hard time awarding Charlotte anything less than four Antetokounmpos. Alas… In the meantime, I’ll happily settle with their slick new court design, and the fact that they might actually be good this season – at least by Eastern Conference standards. Most notably, the Bugs flat-out stole Lance Stephenson away from the Pacers this past summer, simultaneously landing the gritty backcourt complement to Kemba Walker they so badly needed while significantly upgrading their League Pass attraction potential. Though it’s undeniable that under Steve Clifford Charlotte are a team focused on solid defense (at 103.8, they had the 5th best points allowed per 100 possessions mark last year) rather than explosive offense, in my eyes the Hornets figure to be surprisingly captivating watch this upcoming year. Consider the following; Al Jefferson‘s footwork will once again be a treat to watch on the left block, while the aforementioned Kemba is always reliable for some lively (if slightly pint-sized) entertainment at the PG spot. Per custom, Lance will make them dance, besides whom PJ Hairston and Noah Vonleh, an intriguing rookie duo, can provide the lyrics. Now if only Michael Kidd-Gilchrist could shoot… Ah screw it, they’re getting four! Bring back the starter jackets!4

  • Miami Heat – After 3 straight trips to the finals, the Heat entered the 2013/14 season running on the fumes of fumes, and boy was it obvious. For a third consecutive year, despite having the most transcendent athlete of his generation, as well as Dwyane Wade and Chris Bosh, Miami’s pace declined relative to the rest of the league (they ranked 27th last year after being 16th and 23rd the two seasons prior). Additionally, though they still forced turnovers at a league-leading rate, Miami’ s defense slipped to its lowest point in the LeBron era, surrendering 105.8 points per 100 possessions, while their fast break points stagnated at 12.5 per game. But for playing in the East, their advanced age (Miami were the oldest team in the league with an average age of 30.6) and lack of roster depth might have been exposed even earlier than it eventually was. Then came the hammer. LeBron is now gone, leaving behind Wade and his gimpy knees, Bosh and his increased proclivity to settle for long jumpers, the insufferable Seven Nation Army chant, and the newly signed Luol Deng – who was run into the ground by Tom Thibodeau in Chicago before being unjustly dumped in Cleveland last season. And please, don’t tell me that the signings of Josh McRoberts and Danny Granger are making things better; this is a team on the decline, with little hope on the immediate horizon, and few potential sources of League Pass joy. No wonder James left. Watch at your peril. 1.5
  • Orlando Magic – Two seasons removed from the Dwight Howard trade, and the Magic have nicely turned the assets directly gained – in addition to the high draft picks accrued from being so lousy – into a flotilla of exciting young players. Victor Oladipo, Aaron Gordon, Elfriid Payton, Tobias Harris, Nikola Vucevic, everywhere you look there’s a player under the age of 25 with considerable upside. At present though, how they all fit together into something resembling a coherent future plan remains unclear, a mystery unlikely to be solved by the insipid coaching of Jacque Vaughn. On that less than inspiring note, can anyone explain why GM Rob Hennigan saw fit to sign 31-year-olds Channing Frye (4 years, $32 million) and Ben Gordon (2 years, $9 million) to multiyear deals? Aside from being odd decisions, both are damaging additions to Orlando’s watchability this year – with apathetic home attendance levels and ordinary uniforms (the throwbacks are delicious mind you), why not make the best of a bad situation by throwing the ball out and letting the young guys run? You might even stumble into something vaguely exciting. 2
  • Washington Wizards – All aboard, this is the last call for passengers on the Washington Professional Basketball Team bandwagon! It’s getting full! There’s not much left to say after Grantland‘s resident ‘zards fan Andrew Sharp covered darn near everything about their impressive offseason, but just quickly, think about this when firing up the ol’ LP browser window; John Wall and Bradley Beal should be one of the most exciting backcourt duos in the league. Nene and the newly re-signed Marcin Gortat are surprisingly adept passers for big men, and give Washington enviable quality up front. Young wings Otto Porter and Glen Rice Jr. tore up the Summer League, and won’t even be pressured to contribute given the addition of Paul ‘Freakin Pierce. Combine Pierce’s documented bad-assery with the Polish Hammer’s strong Twitter presence, and throw in the occasional presence of President Barry O, and this is a very cool team all of a sudden. If (and considering their coach is Randy Wittman, it’s a big if) Washington can simply clean up their offense a tad, they should be one of the best teams in the East, the prospective leaders of the pack behind Cleveland and Chicago atop the conference. Personally, I can’t wait to watch them; it’s time for a Wizard Party! 4.5
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The Definitive 2014/15 NBA League Pass Ratings (Part II) – With Help From Giannis Antetokounmpo!

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As soon as I returned home from work on Sunday, I introduced The Definitive 2014/15 NBA League Pass Ratings, kicking things off with a review of the Atlantic Division. Spoiler alert – The Drakes, my mistake, Toronto, might be the only team worth watching this year, as reflected by their above-average Giannis score. That’s right, as alluded to in the title, I measure a team’s LP potential on a scale of Greek Freaks, in honour of the official 2013/14 League Pass Darling and still-growing human embodiment of fun. For more on how I (extremely subjectively) determine the ratings, as well as a longer preamble, go back and read the first piece!

In a well-timed celebration of today being the date the actual product becomes available, this series continues along in the East. It’s The Definitive 2014/15 NBA League Pass Ratings: Central Division edition. And Holy Comic-Sans is it top-heavy.

  • Chicago Bulls – This one’s a toughie, at least on first sight. On the one hand, and especially for the more casual NBA fan, the Bulls and their miserly pace, (29th ranked 90.2 possessions per 48 minutes) and horrific offense (93.7 PPG, last in the league) were borderline unwatchable minus Derrick Rose last season, and were rightly exposed in the playoffs. On the other, more analytically-inclined hand though, Coach Tom Thibodeau’s suffocating brand of defense was once again amazing (limiting opponents to 100.5 points per 100 possessions, the 2nd best figure across the league), while the coupling of Joakim Noah‘s play and Taj Gibson‘s improvement meant Chicago were at least semi-decent in terms of record. This year, both sides should be appeased. The Return, Part Deux, of Derrick Rose, along with the intriguing additions of Pau Gasol and Nikola Mirotic (not to mention the drafting of Dougie McBuckets), should ensure the offense is eminently more enjoyable, whereas the subtraction of Carlos Boozer will likely further improve the already-stifling defense. Combine their expected performance (13/2 to win the 2015 NBA Championship, per the Bovada Sportsbook) with Chicago’s timeless jerseys and a strong United Center crowd, and the Bulls should be a strong League Pass team – ‘should’ being almost entirely dependent on the health status of Rose’s knees.4
  • Cleveland Cavaliers – Must I really explain why the Cavaliers are going to be appointment viewing this season? Thanks to a certain fellow’s decision to return home to Ohio, the Q will be absolutely raucous for 41 nights next year, as the Cavs attempt to live up to their high billing*. The addition of a third superstar in Kevin Love (as well as a host of other useful veterans) to team up with LeBron and the league’s pre-eminent layup artist – point guard holdover Kyrie Irving – Cleveland are the NBA’s new villainous super team, and will have the other 29 teams gunning for them every game; you won’t be starved of effort watching teams go up against the talent of the Cavs. Toss in their fantastic uniforms and Andy Varejao’s voluminous locks, and Cleveland have all the makings of LP greatness. In fact, as far as I can tell the only downside to tuning into the Cavs might be the broadcast team – Austin Carr‘s excessive enthusiasm will only be spurred on by heightened viewership, so perhaps choose the opponent’s feed. If the worst comes to the worst, you can always mute it, and enjoy the my preseason League Pass Team of the Year in silence.5GA

  • Detroit Pistons – It’s been a long time since the ‘DEEEE-troit Basketball’ chant reverberated around The Palace of Auburn Hills, but with the hire of Stan Van Gundy to preside over affairs, the seeds have been sown for future success. Unfortunately, the on-court product – laden down by the onerous contracts and woeful shot selection of lefty Oak Hill alums Josh Smith and Brandon Jennings – still looks a couple of years away from even beginning to bloom. The development of Andre Drummond after a summer spent in the USAB framework might be worth keeping an eye on, but only from afar; if Drummond is truly to become Schreechin’ SVG’s midwest version of Dwight Howard, he’ll have to improve his ghastly 41.8% FT percentage in order to avoid the incredibly frustrating ‘Hack-a-_____’ tactic. No one wants to see endless bricks from the charity stripe, even if they do come in perhaps the best alternate uniform in the league. For now, Detroit will remain distinctly below-par.1
  • Indiana Pacers – Even at their hard-nosed best, Indiana were often hard to watch last year. Much like Chicago, the Pacers combined excellent defense (a league-best 99.3 points allowed per 100 possessions) with offensive ineptitude (92.3 PPG) and tortoise-like pace (92.5 possessions per game), grinding teams into submission en route to a Conference high 56-26 season. Of course, that obscures the fact they also suffered the strangest post-All-Star Break collapse of all time, a putrid stretch which revolved around Roy Hibbert‘s poor impression of Hasheem Thabeet, and culminated in rumors about Coach Frank Vogel’s future. Vogel stayed, but Indiana’s spark plug left – Lance will be making them dance in Charlotte this year, the 8th grader pushed out after the Pacers opted not to improve their initial contract offer. Any hope that remained for 2014/15, both in terms of on court success and League Pass entertainment, officially passed when Paul George horrifically fractured his leg during Team USA’s intrasquad Blue/White Scrimmage last month – an injury that ensured an endless diet of depressing George Hill/David West pick and pops will be on the menu at Bankers Life Fieldhouse this year. Any takers? Anyone?!0.5
  • Milwaukee Bucks – In spite of Giannis’ length-infused pixie dust, the Bucks stunk their way to a 15-67 record last year, somehow managing to accrue even more losses than the blatantly tanking Philadelphia. Their reward? Jabari Parker, whose rookie campaign instantly elevates Milwaukee to at least mildly interesting status. Aside from simply watching Jabari’s ROY charge, there are actually plenty of reasons for optimism that the Bucks will be a significantly better League Pass product this season. For one, Larry Drew has been replaced on the bench by Jason Kidd, his revolutionary timeout tactics, and strong facial hair game. Secondly, after singlehandedly submarine many a fantasy team (including mine), with a string of injuries and suspensions during the 2013/14 campaign, the chance of a redemptive Larry Sanders year seems high. If Sanders can be SANDERS! (hat tip to Grantland‘s Zach Lowe) and return to the shot-blocking ways of his third year, he and John Henson could inspire a Chad Ford-gasm with their collective length on defense. And finally, in a prime example of burying the lede, they have Giannis, the still-growing Greek Freak who possesses the unrivaled ability to alternate stunning athleticism with Bambi-on-ice moments on consecutive possessions, all while wearing a smile as wide as OJ Mayo’s waistline across his face. Adjust your TV/laptops/tablets/phones accordingly, the Bucks are watchable once more.3.5

* Continuing with the 2015 Championship odds, again per Bovada, Cleveland are the preseason favourites to win it all at a price of 7/2.

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The Definitive 2014/15 NBA League Pass Ratings – With Help From Giannis Antetokounmpo!

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Few sales emails ever cause me happiness. In fact most of them inspire my unsubscribing from the source, and are hastily trashed, never to cause me such consternation again. The annual notification from the folks over at nba.com though, reminding me that their truly glorious League Pass product will soon be on sale (Tuesday 2nd September, mark your calendars and adjust your schedules accordingly), brings on unbridled joy I can’t begin to describe. The mere prospect of a month spent binge-watching archived footage is enough to get my juices flowing. Suffice to say, the instant access to every single game on demand once the season begins in earnest has me doing my best Pavlov’s dog impression.

Therein lies the problem. Given how I am such an NBA hound, I want to consume every minute of action. Unfortunately, due to annoyingly necessary aspects of life (university, work, sleeping, et cetera), as tough as it may be, such a dream must go unfulfilled. Games need to be picked carefully then, in order to maximise my viewing experience.

Enter, the definitive 2014/15 NBA League Pass Ratings.

In somewhat of a self-serving exercise, I’ll be providing each team with a watchability rating – measured on a sliding scale of Giannis Antetokounmpos (Giannis, Gianni, Giannix, what’s the plural here?), with 5 being appointment viewing, and 0 being a team best left for the two-minute recap. Why Giannis you might ask? Quite simply, The Greek Freak was the official 2013/14 League Pass Darling, his wonderfully effervescent combination of mind-boggling athleticism and deer-in-the-headlights moments making the woeful Bucks occasionally palatable, if not aesthetically pleasing. Throw in the fact he put on a Magic Johnson-esque display in Summer League, and well, yeah… He’s the still-growing human embodiment of fun.

Anyway, on to the (extremely fast and loose, and ultimately subjective) ratings, determined by a number of factors including but not limited to, star power, pace, uniform, atmosphere (arena/crowd/PA), and style of play (long-range bombers, or low post grinders?). Today (in alphabetical order), it’s the Atlantic Division, with the remaining 25 teams to be judged at a later date.

  • Boston Celtics – Oh boy, not a good place to start. I mean really, is anyone looking at the schedule this year and saying ‘Awesome! The C’s are in town!’? In Brad Stevens’ first year at the helm, Boston were a struggle to watch offensively, racking up the fifth fewest points per game (96.2) on the third worst effective field goal percentage (.477). Things aren’t likely to be much better this year either, with Danny Ainge adding precious little over the offseason to a core that all too prominently includes such names as Jeff Green, Jared Sullinger, and Kelly Olynyk. Never before has such apathy been inspired than in re-reading that last sentence. Though initially rumored to be in the Kevin Love sweepstakes, which would have greatly improved their rating, Boston eventually ended up simply re-signing Avery Bradley (4 years, $32 million), and bringing in the middling (at best) Evan Turner during free agency. Where no. 6 pick Marcus Smart fits in remains a mystery, and probably not one worth watching either. In fact, if it’s not a Rajon Rondo national television performance, you’ve no excuse to be wasting time on the Celtics whatsoever.
    0.5
  • Brooklyn Nets – After a 2013/14 campaign that was at first entertaining because of their surprising ineptitude, but leveled off once they embraced small ball and subsequently, their destiny as Miami’s playoff fodder, the Nets appear to have further regressed down the League Pass rating scale heading into this season. Gone from Brooklyn are Jason Kidd‘s sideline antics, roguish stubble and lack of tie; in his place comes Lionel Hollins, last (not) seen coaching the Grit ‘n’ Grind Grizzlies on NBA TV during the 2012/12 playoffs. Paul Pierce has also moved on in favor of greener pastures, taking his rally calls to Washington, and crucially, damaging the flexible lineup Brooklyn eventually hit upon last year. In a further blow, Pierce didn’t carry Kevin Garnett‘s rotting corpse off with him. Seeing KG rot is a real shame, especially considering he’s perhaps the only Net with any charisma – Deron Williams, Joe Johnson and Brook Lopez certainly aren’t wowing anyone at this point. Thank goodness for Andrei Kirilenko‘s passing, Beyonce’s occasional court side presence, and that sweet, sweet uniform/court/lighting combination, because otherwise Brooklyn would be a serious challenger to Boston’s League Pass cellar-dweller status. Man, the Atlantic Division is depressing. 1.5
  • New York Knicks – Without Carmelo Anthony re-signing, we would be on our third straight stinker right here. Not that there’s anything particularly wrong with a team full of young wing players – I love Iman Shumpert, Tim Hardaway Jr., and Cleanthony Early – but ‘Melo is the rising tide that lifts all boast here. Without him, and thus the potential for a night like he had against the now defunct Bobcats last January, New York would simply be another laborious Eastern Conference watch. Watching a truly great scorer work night in and night out though, in those classic uniforms and in arguably the NBA’s most famous arena, and they jump to at least vanilla viewing. Toss in Derek Fisher‘s coaching debut, with Phil Jackson‘s spectral figure looming from a suite, the MSG crowd’s propensity for booing lackluster performance,and the presence of Giannis’ brother, Thanasis Antetokounmpo, and the Knicks will be a nicely average watch. Just like Carmelo though, we might have to wait until next year for significant improvement. 3

  • Philadelphia 76ers – There’s no way around it, the Sixers were hot garbage last year. Like, truly rancid, not even in the can’t-look-away train wreck mold. No one in their right mind should have been watching their nightly (lack of) efforts, not even the most masochistic Philadelphia sports fan. I can recall two plays from their entire season; Michael Carter-Williams grabbing a steal and going end-to-end in the season opener against Miami, and Tony Wroten nailing his second half-court heave in as many nights. In little coincidence, the Sixers finished 19-63, and tied the NBA record for most consecutive losses (26). This year, there’s little hope for increased competency, especially after Sam Hinkie drafted Joel Embiid (destined for a year ‘recuperating’) and Dario Saric (who will be stashed in Europe for the next two years). That said, the arrival of Nerlens Noel, who was an absolute force in Summer League, might at least provide some additional excitement this year. Additionally, the intrigue surrounding MCW’s sophomore campaign (was his ROY season legitimate, or the result of inflated stats in a horrible rookie crop?) is a further storyline worth monitoring. Throw both in the blender that is Bret Brown’s run and gun offensive scheme*, along with a dash of Alexey Shved‘s unkempt mane and a sprinkling of terrible shot selection from Byron Mullens, and the Sixers will still likely be terrible record-wise, but I might just be able to recall more than two plays this time next year. 1.5
  • Toronto Raptors – Finally, we get to my sleeper League Pass team of the Eastern Conference, and for a ton of reasons: Winning team? It sure looks that way with the talent already assembled in Toronto, especially so given how they play in the woeful East. Awesome in-game dunkers? Heck yes – Demar Derozan and Terrence Ross have more than got the aerial entertainment covered. A legitimate home court advantage? The #WeTheNorth phenomenon would certainly suggest so, as fans of the Raptors proved more than just happy to be there in last years postseason. Surprisingly entertaining good, but not great players? Amir Johnson and Jonas Valunciunas fit the mold. Solid mascot? The Raptor is Zach Lowe’s favourite. Kyle Lowry? Kyle ‘Effin Lowry! Lint rollers on deck? C’mon now. Add in the early start times on Sunday – a real boon for European fans – and the Raptors should be an above average League Pass team this year, and the class of the Atlantic Division.4

* Philadelphia had a mind-boggling 99.2 possessions per game last year.

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Meaningful(ish) Basketball Alert!

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Lost in the furore of the return of College Football (#GoDucks), believe it or not, there’s actually some meaningful(ish) basketball being played tomorrow. That’s right, it’s the Not-Olympics, the FIBA World Cup of Basketball! So while most of America will be separating into ravenous packs of alumni, crowning a Heisman winner after one week of action*, and discussing all things Nick Saban, the actual freakin’ USA will be kicking off their Spanish crusade to be named World Champions on September 14th.

The Artist Formerly Known As Netw3rk, Jason Concepcion, handily provided a primer over on Grantland today to whet your appetite, with the games actually starting in earnest from 4.30 AM ET(!) tomorrow morning. Starting things off in Seville, it’s a heavyweight fight between Croatia and the Philippines, featuring first-round stash Dario Saric and after some political wrangling, Andray Blatche. At the same time, Ukraine will take on the Dominican Republic in Bilbao, and an hour later, live from Gran Canaria it’s the game of the day – Angola vs. Korea. Stick with it, I promise it will get better.

The actual game of the day should actually be at 11 AM ET, with Brazil and France locking horns in a meeting which will include some legitimate NBA talent – just not Tony Parker. Finally, The USA will then provide the nightcap to the opening slate of action, with Mike Krzyzewksi’s semi-first choice squad playing Finland at 9.30 PM local time (3.30 PM ET).

Despite them theoretically being the tournament favourites, plenty of questions yet hang over the USA team. Will James Harden‘s newfound leadership skills fill the void left by Kevin Durant to mental fatigue/ongoing shoe contract negotiations? Is Derrick Rose DERRICK ‘EFFIN ROSE again**? Can Andre Drummond make two consecutive free throws? If Anthony Davis gets in foul trouble, will Demarcus Cousins and Mason Plumless be able to hold down the middle in the international format? How badly will Steph Curry’s butter-like defense be exposed by the hot knife that is Finnish guard play?

Thank God there’s a couple of weeks before the inevitably testing Spain game to resolve these tough questions. Until then, enjoy the show.

** Despite my Pac-12 allegiance, I’m rooting for Myles Jack. A linebacker and running back? Conference Offensive and Defensive Freshman Player of the Year as a true freshman? How can you not love this guy?

* All signs point to yes so far. Missed you D-Rose.

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Eric Bledsoe, Nice to Know You.

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Tweets like these worry me, and for good reason. As the summer drags on, it seems increasingly unlikely that the Phoenix Suns bring back Eric Bledsoe – acquired just last summer in a three-team heist – on anything more than a $3.7 million qualifying offer. We all know the situation at this point; after putting up averages of 17.7 points, 4.7 rebounds, 5.5 assists, and posting a 19.6 Player Efficiency Rating in 43 games last year, all for the modest salary of $2.6 million, the 24-year-old Bledsoe entered this offseason as a restricted free agent, he and his agent Rich Paul looking for the maximum five-year, $84 million contract only Phoenix could offer. The Suns countered with a four year, $48 million offer, matching the terms agreed to by Kyle Lowry and the Raptors. Since then, neither side has softened their stance, with relations souring to the point that Phoenix reportedly attempted to hijack the Kevin Love trade in a misjudged attempt to get something for their presumably departing PG.

For every day Bledsoe remains on the roster as an expiring contract, his trade value declines. Because I’m an irrational Phoenix fan, I assume GM Ryan McDonough won’t to be able to move him for anything of value, especially not for assets such as Julius Randle, as rumored. Gone are the days of half season rentals without the promise of the incoming player signing an extension, as the Cavs found out with Luol Deng last year (of course, it worked out alright for Cleveland eventually). Based on his agent choice, I fully expect Bledsoe and his freakish athleticism to become an unrestricted free agent next summer. But where might he land, assuming it won’t be Phoenix?

As it stands today, seven teams* are projected to be over the 2015/16 cap maximum of $66,500,000**. Though crude, for I doubt even Nate Silver could predict the extensions, buyouts, trades, free agent/rookie signings etc. that will inevitably affect the respective payrolls of these franchises over the next 12 months, because of their relative lack of financial flexibility, let’s (for now anyway) rule them out of the Bledsoe running. Similarly, we can probably eliminate teams such as the Pelicans, Raptors, or Lakers, who despite having more salary available to dole out, have far too much invested in their backcourts already (New Orleans have an apocalyptic $41,299,979 tabbed for guards in 2015/16, but exactly $0 going to the center spot).

Numerous other teams have plenty of projected space, but plans for the PG slot already in motion; Orlando, for example, have a boatload of money to spend (their projected cap figure for 2015/16 is just $32,150,587 at the moment), but having selected Victor Oladipo and Elfrid Payton over the last couple of drafts, are unlikely to be interested in acquiring Bledsoe too. And of course, plenty of rosters already feature point guards who are frankly better than Bledsoe; Chicago aren’t going to be moving on from 2010/11 MVP Derrick Rose anytime soon (presuming his knee remains intact), nor are OKC dropping Russell Westbrook. The same goes for Portland and Damian Lillard, who will soon be up for an extension himself.

For a number of reasons then, the market for Bledsoe might not be as hot as Rich Paul is anticipating. Some remaining squads however, while perhaps not as snugly as in Phoenix, would seem to offer fits for the young man dubbed by Jamal Crawford, ‘Mini-LeBron’. Let’s take a look at those few, (and simultaneously steel Phoenix fans’ fortitude):

  • New York Knicks – Even counting the recent mega-extension (5 years, $124 million) of Carmelo Anthony, the Knickerbockers figure to be in fine financial shape by the time Bledsoe’s unrestricted free agency rolls around. With the expensive booby prize of the much-ballyhooed 2010 free agency class, Amar’e Stoudemire, finally coming off the books after this season (along with the oddly-acquired Andrea Bargnani), New York are scheduled to shed around 53% of their 2014 cap figure ($90,808,126), and provisionally arrive at a $42,237,033 floor next summer, meaning, as explained by Grantland‘s Zach Lowe, the Knicks could have as much as $23 million or so in cap room to build a team around Carmelo. Obviously that’s more than enough room to cater to Bledsoe’s demands, with the prospect of playing with ‘Melo, for (effectively) Phil Jackson, at MSG surely a situation desirable enough to entice the Kentucky alum, yet still the fit is far from perfect; with $0 committed to the center position and only seven players under contract (including PGs Jose Calderon and Pablo Prigioni), perhaps the Knicks will look elsewhere first – Marc Gasol for instance – or even hoard their cash for The Summer of KD in 2016. Don’t forget, Rajon Rondo, who seems to love playing in Midtown Manhattan judging by some of his ridiculous performances there, is an unrestricted free agent too.
  • Philadelphia 76ers – Perhaps it’s a stretch, but couldn’t you at least envision Philadelphia making at least a cursory run at Bledsoe? Sam Hinkie doesn’t intend to tank forever, right? Right?! Thanks to his remarkable demolition of a mediocre roster, Hinkie has blessed the Sixers organization with two things that go hand in hand – money and young talent; Philly amazingly has just a $14,062,328 estimated cap figure for the 2015/6 season, with the majority of that total owed to top draft picks, Michael Carter-Williams, Nerlens Noel, and Joel Embiid (though presumably there will yet be another high pick to add to that bunch next year). The fact that they already have MCW doesn’t necessarily impede the addition of Bledsoe to Brett Brown’s squad either; as demonstrated alongside John Wall at Kentucky as well as with Goran Dragic in Phoenix, Bledsoe is comfortable sharing the backcourt with another point guard. The idea of playing two interchangeable ball handlers additionally seems to be a growing phenomenon across the league as a whole (expect Orlando, Utah, and possibly Boston to roll with the dual-PG look for stretches this season), and the pairing of Bledsoe with Carter-Williams would be as good as any***.

  • Sacramento Kings – Rather than re-signing Isaiah Thomas, he of the 20.3 points and 6.3 assists per game averages last season, and eventual 4 year, $28 million deal, Sacramento instead chose to pay Darren Collison $16 million over the next 3 years, their full midlevel exception. There’s a reason – which incidentally, is not being blocked positionally by Chris Paul – why Collison is now on his fifth team in six years; though occasionally he has shown flashes of brilliance (ask Oklahoma City), Collison is maddeningly inconsistent, and a poor defender. Vivek Ranadive, who is perhaps the perfect example of a ‘we must win, NOW!’ new owner, will soon realise his mistake. With Rudy Gay‘s onerous contract coming off the books, the Kings project to have only $42,145,300 committed to the 2015/16 season, and a promising young core (Ben McLemore and Nike Stauskas on the wings, DeMarcus Cousins manning the middle) in place. Long linked to Rajon Rondo, that ship looks to have now sailed, which in combination with Collison’s impending letdown, will leave Ranadive and the Kings shopping for a point guard next summer. A Bledsoe/Boogie Kentucky Class of 2010 reunion would be a pleasure to watch.
  • Atlanta Hawks – Yes, they’ll still have 2 years, $16 million worth of positional incumbent Jeff Teague come next summer, and the rookie contract of Dennis Schröder too, but the Hawks remain an intriguing candidate to make a push to ink Bledsoe, a Birmingham, AL native. As evidenced by his deal to bring in Paul Millsap last summer, Atlanta GM Danny Ferry will pounce immediately should Bledsoe’s stock drop to a reasonable value, and worry about the fit later (though as it turned out, Millsap was an excellent match with new coach Mike Budenholzer’s scheme, and ably filled the void left by Al Horford). Though far from coveted as a free agent destination, Atlanta will have plenty of money available (they project to have the 25th lowest cap figure, $39,057,353), and can offer Bledsoe the chance to play near home for a team seemingly on the rise in the woeful Eastern Conference.

All salary figures sourced from the wonderful spotrac.com, a NBA enthusiast’s dream of a site.

* Brooklyn, naturally, head the pile with an estimated total figure (including cap holds) of $80,469,615. Following the Nets, in order, are the Cavaliers, Heat, Clippers, Nuggets, Washington Professional Basketball Team/Bullets, and Warriors.

** The cap maximum for the 2014/15 season, for the sake of comparison, is $63,065,000, while the luxury tax threshold is $76,829,000. The tax threshold is yet to be set for the 2015/16 campaign.

*** They might lack for outside shooting, but imagine the combined wingspan in the passing lanes. Holy Giannis…

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Meet Mike D’Antoni’s Moustache

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My name is Tom, and I’m a Phoenix Suns fan.

I first fell in love with the Suns back in 2007. I was preparing to go on a trip to Spain with my Year 9 classmates and, in need of some reading material for the short flight, I picked up a magazine. That magazine was SLAM #108, the cover adorned by three guys who, up to that point, held no significance to me. It was emblazoned with the title ‘The Big Bang: Amare, Nash & Marion are scorching the NBA’. From that feature on, I was hooked – Mike D’Antoni‘s Seven Seconds or Less Suns machine was my drug.

Though they made only scant appearances on the weekly NBA game Channel 5 would broadcast (which I would record religiously given how it aired at 1 AM on a Wednesday morning), I kept up with Phoenix’s progress through various means. Every morning I would catch their two minute game highlights on NBA.com, suffering through my family’s crappy dial-up internet connection (we were a tad late on the broadband bandwagon). I’d save SLAM stories. Later that summer, I would be outraged about Robert Horry‘s hip-check of Nash, the subsequent suspensions of Stoudemire and Boris Diaw effectively ending Phoenix’s playoff run. I still feel cheated.

And I’ve stuck with them ever since, through occasionally thick and mostly thin; the ill-fated trade of Marion for a decidedly past-his-prime Shaquille O’Neal; the brief Terry Porter era; the amazing, unexpected run to the Western Conference Finals under Alvin Gentry in 2010; Amar’e leaving; the inane signings (Michael Beasley anyone?) and mediocre years that followed, all whilst Nash’s pre-eminent talents faded away; the Jeff Hornacek/Goran Dragic feel-good story of last year. Everything. I couldn’t quit Phoenix if I tried at this point.

Naturally then, Mike D’Antoni’s mustache will be Suns-centric. They’re too large an influence in my NBA experience for  it to be otherwise. That’s not to say that I won’t write about other topics – I love the NBA as a whole, probably too much in fact, and enjoy all aspects of the league. Transactions, statistics, breakouts, incredible facial hair, you name it, I’ll probably cover it (in between writing my dissertation of course – Cuban Literature, if you cared). Hopefully you’ll enjoy it anyway.

My name is Tom, and I’m a Phoenix Suns fan.

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